Some Photos of Us

Daniel & I









God's best,
Whit

Courtship: A Deeper Connection

What I've found along the Way that lines up with my intentions and purpose concerning courtship and marriage:

All are excerpts from this article I'm reading: http://www.boundless.org/2005/answers/a0002415.cfm by John Thomas of Boundless.org.

To love is not to share all the same interests, but it is to value those the other person has.

If marriage is anything, it is a deep-level connection. ... Connecting at deeper levels develops over time as trust grows and as an individual feels they are in a safe place to share at that level.

Enjoying one another’s company is a great starting place for any relationship and obviously a requirement, but we can only talk about the weather for so long.

Conversations that touch at the level of emotions, ranging from joy to pain, are the ones that create heart connection.

Remember what you’re doing: First, you’re trying to discern whether you’re in unity on core values and second, whether you can connect at the level of emotions.

Enter With Your Eyes Open!: Courtship, Marriage & Covenant

An excerpt from "Reversing the Marriage Implosion: The Covenant" by Dr. Robert Reccord, http://www.believe.com/articles/Relationships/Reversing-the-Marriage-Implosion-The-Covenant/

Enter With Your Eyes Open!

As marriages hurtle into the future before them, we must remind every couple to keep their eyes open for the needs and fears of the other. A wise, seasoned counselor told me years ago that the greatest need of women is security, and her greatest fear is insecurity. Conversely,the greatest need of a man is adequacy, and his greatest fear, inadequacy. If only my wife and I had been told this before we got married, not years later!

Within every wife, there is a little girl craving to hear that she is pretty, valued, treasured and loved. She can handle multiple moves, shaky finances, job difficulties and worse as long as she is relationally secure with her man. Every husband longs to hear, “I’m proud of you because…” He yearns to know he is adequate in his leadership. In conference after conference, women sit stunned when my wife asks men to lower their head and raise their hand on what they would prefer to hear from their wife: “I love you,” or “I’m proud of you.” “I’m proud of you” wins hands down (or up in this case). Even the makers of Viagra and Calais understand a man’s passionate desire to be adequate!

So, what implosions might be avoided if every couple walking toward the altar were clearly guided on the foundational need/fear of their potential mate? It would so clearly show how our IEDs (improvised explosive devices) of words and actions within marriage can rupture the infrastructure of our relationships and bring our homes crashing in around us.

Maybe right now is a good time for you to assess yourself and the needs of the loved one in your life. What do you see that you might not have seen before? What are you going to do about it?

http://www.believe.com/articles/Relationships/Reversing-the-Marriage-Implosion-The-Covenant/

Abba is good. Heh, heh, saw my eyes perk up a bit while reading this. Be blessed.

Whitney

sky

All photos taken with a Kodak 12MP Digital Camera

Of all the photos, you can see where my interest was. lol.
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Movie & Books

Fireproof
I watched this movie the other evening. I'm not a big movie-buff, so this was a bit out of the ordinary for me. Yet, I LOVE a good Christian movie (and let me tell you that there are HARDLY any out there). I don't cry at movies, I hardly even cry at funerals, if you can fathom that truth... but, this one made me cry some. I'm not really good giving reviews, but I definitely know when I like a movie/book and when I don't. This one was great... with great resources:

http://www.fireproofyourmarriage.com
http://www.thelovedarebook.com
Check it out. It could save your life.

Boy Meets Girl: Say Hello to Courtship by Joshua Harris
This here is a book I've been wanting for a while. I ordered it a few days ago and it came in the mail recently! It was on my wish list along with his other book "I Kissed Dating Goodbye." Both are books that encourage courtship and a godly union between a man and woman who seek the please the Lord in all of their doings. I personally no longer agree with dating, the world's way of finding a mate. It does not have the same characteristics and qualities of courtship. It's as if you have to go through trial and error in order to experience love... I don't approve. I'm interested in beginning this book right away, but I'm already in between three other books, so I'll have to wait!

The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis
I've never read any books by C.S. Lewis if you can believe that, even with being a graduate of religious studies! So, this one will be a first. I've read the reviews on Amazon.com and I must say that I'm quite impressed. The book is written from the perspective of a grand demon [Screwtape] who writes letters to his nephew, and up and coming demon, giving him tips and advice on how to tempt various Christians [referred to as "patients"].

The Christian author is very successful in invoking repentant feelings within the one reading it because it's like reading a book written by Satan himself; in the author's case, from the perspective of Satan. It's a very intriguing book, from what I've read and I've already learned a few life-changing lessons from simply reading small excerpts from the book! I'm excited. Go check out Amazon.com's reviews and I bet you'll be taken back a bit as well.

Goodnight,
Whitney

"The Bachelor:" Real Talk.

Yeah, so I watch this show because it "promises" the hope of marriage at the end of the show. Tonight I was particularly distraught when I saw Jason so ignorantly and selfishly dismiss Melissa after having given her a rose... wait, he gave her a ring and PROPOSED.

I absolutely was rooting for Jason in the beginning because he was a stand up guy. I don't hate him, but I see him as a victim. A victim of dating. It's really sad.

And, I feel especially compassionate toward Melissa. No, it doesn't make sense, Melissa. (Melissa said it didn't make sense). It doesn't make sense because it's spiritual and you must be spiritual to understand. Jason was manipulated into thinking he could not live without Molly. Whether it was the works of his family or Molly herself and her witchcraft crew-- SOMETHING SPIRITUAL happened. I knew Molly was wrong for Jason and I knew Melissa was perfect for Jason. The thing is that, it's not Melissa's fault. It's not Jason's fault. They are both victims of serial dating. Dating is detrimental because you're giving bits and pieces of your heart away to every person you date...

It causes people who have been "dumped" to develop insecurities, doubt, low self-esteem, low self-worth and the like. Every time I see such heartbreak, I pray to the Lord that the person doesn't kill him or herself. It's that serious. Before the Lord saved me I was a victim of dating. This thing is spiritual and Christians need to stop doing it. God doesn't like it. God has one mate intended for us (if it's in the Lord's will anyway), not two, not three. And THAT'S WHY Jason should have never gotten involved with two women at the same time, whether he was "The Bachelor" or not.

I compare it to the likes of Hollywood-- they can't keep relationships. Since becoming featured on "The Bachelor," Jason became a type of "celebrity," if you will. With fame comes arrogance; the idea that you can have anyone you want, no matter who you hurt.

The minute I saw him crying over the balcony, I knew he should have never went on that show. It was just too much for him. He had given his heart away so many times that he could hardly bear another break-up (the break-up with Molly). The first break-up was when he and his wife got divorced (not to mention the break-ups he might have had beforehand), the next was with DeAnna, the next was with Molly and the last was with Melissa-- no wait, that won't be the last break-up... what a ridiculous cycle of hell. He'll never be happy as long as he's dating... it's not possible. Happiness apart from God doesn't exist; it's a lie, it's an illusion, it's a false-sense of security.

God have mercy on your people.
What a waste. What a disappointment.

Lord Jesus it is my prayer that You mend and heal the broken heart of Melissa, who appeared on "The Bachelor." In Jesus' name, amen.

Read I Corinthians 7 and get the book "Choosing God's Best," it's on my Amazon Book list in the right-hand panel.